Friday, April 10, 2009


Something is heavy on my heart at the moment. I received a comment on the blog I wrote about my dad. It was sent to my email. It was very encouraging but there was also a comment that has stuck in my head....."everyone has their vices but they don't always make you a bad person". I am assuming this person was referring to my dad's alcoholism. While I was very grateful for the encouragement, I also felt the need to say that while I agreed with that statement, I feel that "certain vices can get in the way of relationships".

Then I started thinking of all the vices around us...alcohol, drugs, tobacco, pornography, food, and I am sure you can even think of more. I was wondering if we could have healthy vices, so I decided to look up vices on and according to their site vices are:

An evil, degrading, or immoral practice or habit.
A serious moral failing.
Wicked or evil conduct or habits; corruption.
A slight personal failing; a foible: the vice of untidiness.
A flaw or imperfection; a defect.
Vice A character representing generalized or particular vice in English morality plays.
A jester or buffoon.
Sexual immorality, especially prostitution
An undesirable habit

Wow, that gives me a lot to consider in my own life...what kind of vices do I hold onto. I strongly believe that vices can affect relationships. I agree that vices don't make you a bad person...but it is obvious that certain vices are very unhealthy for you (and can greatly affect those who love and care about you). It depends on the vice and the relationship involved, but none the less, I am sure all of the above definitions have the power and ability to affect more than just the person using/doing the vice. It seems to me that vices have the ability to have a lot of power. A vice allows you NOT to deal directly with whatever it is that brought you to the vice in the first place. Vices are like band aides. They cover the wound but they can't fix the real problem.

My challenge to you....examine your life and see if you have any vices that could be affecting any relationships that you have. If so, I pray you have the courage to take the band aide off and deal directly with whatever brought you to the vice in the first place. This can be very hard and challenging, even scary for some of us... but the reward of renewed relationships and a tender heart will be worth it! ps as I was looking for a "cool" photo...I came across tools that are vices...interesting that the main purpose is to squeeze something together and hold it tightly


  1. Wow!! That was great writing. I am totally impressed with your writing abilities. You are a natural(with lots of work, I'm sure). To me this means your book is going to be a great read too. Can't wait!!

    As far as the definition on 'vice' goes; it's ironic how easily a word definition can change by just adding one or two letters to it. For instance, de-vice or ad-vice. But this is a different topic altogether. Back to the original vice, Alcoholism. It is a terrible disease that affects everyone involved but mostly the loved ones. Like other vices Heroin, Meth, etc. it is extremely hard to stop the cravings once addicted. Our brain actually creates more mental receptors to accept the alcohol and/or drugs. Then when one tries to quit, not only do average normal nerve receptors scream out for more but the newly created receptors do too. Hence, the major re-withdrawl problems associated with additions.

    I grew up watching my mom take care of her alcoholic brother. From the time he was probably 14 until about 2 years prior to his death at age 57 from liver failure, he was addicted. There are memories and stories etched in my mind concerning his life I will never forget. Once my father gave my mother an ultimatum, either my uncle went or he would. Dad never left but then again my mom could never divorced herself from her brother either. The good news; the last two years of my uncles life he quit drinking alcohol and caffeine of any kind. He had found our lord one day while laying drunk on the couch watching some Sunday morning Church service on TV. Today, he is back home with our loving father and feeling great.

    Actually, looking forward to your next post...
    Take Care,
    Larry N.

  2. That is something to ponder. To squeeze something together and hold it tightly, WOW! I never really thought about that before!

  3. Wow, Sheryl. I think you are growing more now than ever. You give me so much to think about and so much inspiration in my own life. Know that I'm keeping my "eye" on you all the time, even if the phone calls have been sparse. Thank you for being an instrument of the Lord's in the world to help people heal. The way you respond to others also is not only a lesson for you, but a lesson for others as they watch and absorb what you do. Love always.


Note: Only a member of this blog may post a comment.